The Undertaker vs Yokozuna (WWF, 11-23-1994)

WWF Survivor Series, San Antonio, TX

This is the main event of Survivor Series ’94, a casket rematch between Taker and Yoko. A year before this at Survivor Series, these two went nose-to-nose (well close enough, Yoko’s not tall enough for that) and then-WWF champ Yokozuna showed no fear. But then they met at the ’94 Royal Rumble in a casket match, and Undertaker wound up overwhelmed by a gang of thugs including Genichiro Tenryu because he’s foreign, and then Undertaker ascended to heaven, promising NOT to rest in peace. He was gone until SummerSlam, when he returned to beat himself.

Yokozuna, meanwhile, lost the WWF title back to Bret Hart at WrestleMania X, and his status as a top guy began to pretty quickly erode. This was his last big main event type match, really. He just kept gaining weight for a couple years until finally getting released.

Undertaker points at the casket and Yokozuna comically falls over in fear. Taker stalks forward, Yoko tries to leave the ring, but can’t. Throat thrust, kick, throat thrust, Yoko reverses a whip to the corner and hits a big avalanche, but Taker no-sells it.

Oh, also, Chuck Norris is the ringside enforcer to prevent thugs.

Yokozuna is afeared of the casket, but he gets knocked on top of it. “Right behind him is Chuck Norris!” Paul Bearer and his mega-urn look on. Yoko pulls Taker out to the floor, where Taker blocks a shot and thrusts the throat again, then smacks Yoko’s head off the steps.

Back inside, Undertaker grabs the arm and gets old school. But Yoko comes back with a Samoan drop. Undertaker won’t stay down, though. He’s more determined than usual here, as he’s got stone cold revenge on his mind.

Yoko rolls Taker to the casket, but Taker fights up from his back. Yoko with a headbutt, then Taker snaps Yoko’s neck over the top rope, and Yokozuna eventually finally falls. Undertaker comes back into the ring. Hits the ropes, misses an elbow.

But he sits up again. Yoko with the uranage! Big legdrop! Yoko trying to roll Taker into the casket, he gets the legs in, and Undertaker slides slowly down into it, but he blocks Yokozuna closing the lid.

Four throat thrusts from Taker, and they’re both in the casket and fighting there. Well, Taker is hitting Yokozuna. Now Yoko’s fighting back. Undertaker goes after Fuji, then thrusts Cornette. Cornette sells like a doofus.

Back in and Undertaker walks into a scoop slam from Yokozuna. Taker falls back out to the floor, and then to the apron, where he’s knocked off again by Yokozuna. Taker gets run into the steps as we check in on Chuck Norris. He is stoic in a coat and hat.

Taker tries to get back in, knocked off the apron again. Second time Yoko lets him back in. Right hand in the corner, another, another. Yoko in brawling control, but Taker comes back with a kick. Yoko right, Taker right, repeat, Taker gets the advantage of the trade, but then Yoko cuts him off.

Whip to the corner, Taker hits hard, but bounces out with a clothesline. Yoko stays up. Kick to the gut from Taker. Whip reversed, Taker yanks Yoko’s head back and slams him off the canvas going for a backdrop. Paul Bearer is very happy. The direction these people received in 1994. My God.

Undertaker going to the top rope — he hits a flying clothesline. Undertaker wants to roll Yoko to the casket, but it’s across the ring.

Now coming down the aisle, it’s King Kong Bundy. “Chuck Norris is gonna be tested!” Now Bundy is joined by Bam Bam Bigelow. They both hang back as Norris stands his ground. In the ring they just stand around.

IRS sneaks into the ring and jumps Taker from behind. I guess it all makes enough sense, these guys are all members of the Million Dollar Corporation, and it was Ted DiBiase that Undertaker embarrassed at SummerSlam.

IRS works on Undertaker as Norris stares at the fat guys. Undertaker into the casket. IRS escapes through the crowd. Undertaker’s out. He was put to sleep in a sleephold. Yoko gets up but takes a comedy fall onto his big ass. Yoko goes over to the casket finally, reaches for the lid, goes to shut it, and Undertaker sits up with a choke.

Here comes Jeff Jarrett now! Chuck Norris side kicks that fucker in the chest! Taker in control in the ring. Jumping clothesline and a DDT from Taker. Big boot knocks Yoko into the casket. To control that big body so well between the ropes and into the casket, man. Taker takes Fuji’s Japanese flag, snaps it over his knee, and throws that into the casket, too, before slamming the lid. Undertaker gets his revenge.

Rating: 3/5. Listen, man, I don’t give a fuck. Yokozuna ruled and Undertaker was still cool and Chuck Norris kicked Jeff Jarrett in the chest. Did it have its stupid moments? Of course, it’s 1994 WWF. But it was pretty fun to watch again in 2018.