WWF, Kitchener, Ontario, Canada
Another one from WWF’s Hottest Matches on Coliseum Video. These teams wrestled each other a ton, in both Orient Express forms, between 1990 and 1991; 74 times as best Cagematch can track, including matches at WrestleMania VI (disappointing) and Royal Rumble ’91 (dope). The lesser big match was this team, the Tanaka/Sato team, not the Tanaka/Kato team, which was the better team. And also the Rockers weren’t hungover at the Rumble. (There was also a fun MSG Jannetty-Tanaka singles match.)
The Rockers are in second (Orient Express in the ring already), and the Express attack right away, but the Rockers clear them out fast for the hot start.
We’ve got Sean Mooney and Lord Alfred Hayes on commentary here, an underrated nostalgia team of my youth. Tanaka and Michaels are going to start it out proper. Tanaka with the methodical approach that Vince thinks of with Japanese wrestlers back then, and it results in some kinda goofy communication.
Boy, Sean Mooney and Lord Alfred Hayes have a LOT of thoughts on Japanese people.
Sato comes in without a tag when referee Danny Davis is distracted. The Express do it again with Tanaka coming back. All they’re doing here is a wristlock, mind you.
Once they make a legal tag, Jannetty leapfrogs Tanaka, who then crashes into the incoming Sato. Marty is very happy about having done basically nothing. Jannetty takes Sato over with an armdrag, grabs an arm, and tags Michaels, who comes in with a flying shot to the arm. Michaels off the ropes, shoulderblock on Sato, off the ropes again, swinging neckbreaker gets two.
Armdrag from Michaels and then a tag to Jannetty, and they execute a fancy double team … chop. Jannetty grabs a front facelock. GODDAMN this is Coliseum Video. Jannetty hits a monkey flip, armdrag, and shoulderblock, then Tanaka kicks him in the back of the head from the apron. Story of Marty’s career, really.
Tanaka takes over, and distracts Davis with some inadvertent help from Michaels, while Mr. Fuji whacks Jannetty over the back with his cane ringside. Sato was just Too Old by this point, man out here throwin Nikolai Volkoff kicks.
Tanaka in and holding a chinlock as the Express have cut off the ring. Jannetty valiantly battles across to try for the tag, but when he gets close Tanaka lets him go and hits Michaels on the apron, which of course leads to Michaels the hothead idiot charging into the ring, distracting Danny Davis, and allowing the Express to not only switch but drag Marty back across the ring.
Sato drops a second rope fistdrop for two. Lord Al enjoys that one, and now we’re back to a chinlock. COLISEEUUUUUUMMM!!!
Michaels finally gets the hot tag, and he FLIES in on it, huge backdrop for Tanaka and a superkick for Sato. Jannetty back and they run the Express into one another. Tanaka eats a Michaels superkick, and now they’re all spilling to the floor, where they fight until the Rockers slip back in for the Coliseum Countout Win WOO!
I don’t know why I review these matches other than I guess I hope there’ll be a gem I forgot or never saw, and on the very rare occasion there is, but here’s the standard review: this is a 50% version of what this match could’ve really been, basically, as it wasn’t being performed for TV and if you bought the stupid tape they already had your money. There are some decent moments, enough to make the live crowd not feel ripped off, but nobody’s going all out here.
Tape Machines Are Rolling 
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