The Rockers vs The Orient Express (WWF, 1-19-1991)

WWF Royal Rumble, Miami, FL

A request! A pretty famous PPV opener here, with the Rockers and Orient Express going at it again. The teams met at WrestleMania VI in Toronto in 1990, but that was the Sato/Tanaka Orient Express, this is the Kato/Tanaka version, which is the better team though Kato is not remotely Japanese.

Tanaka jumps Marty before the bell and he and Kato double on Shawn quickly. Marty sneaks back in with a dropkick for Kato, then the Rockers double team Tanaka with a tag team slam. True tag team specialists!

The Express go outside and the Rockers hit a double tope suicida to the floor. Monsoon and Piper do their best to make the strategy of a side headlock sound interesting. Piper was a terrible color commentator mostly, IMO, but he had his moments when he’d stop screaming about how much he hates foreigners and loves American troops.

Marty distracts the referee by accident so the Orient Express take over, but then Shawn hits a moonsault press on one of them (I’m not rewinding now) and the Rockers double up with a tandem dropkick to clear the ring again. Rockers with double crossbodies to the floor, Shawn on Kato, Marty on Tanaka.

Orient Express take over with pretty basic offense and whatnot, teaming up here and there to show off THEIR tag team specialty. But the more methodical offense works nicely; Tanaka and Kato were a really, really good heel team. Tanaka gets a NERVEHOLD. More wrestlers these days need to consider incapacitating their foes via a pointed attack on the trapezius.

Shawn is good face-in-peril here as we once again have the blonde pretty boy needing to make the tag to his tougher, more talented, uglier brown-haired partner. Jannetty is the house afire upon the tag, sending Tanaka packing and hitting Kato with a nice powerslam for two.

Things break down a bit before returning to normal, as will happen. Now Jannetty may be in trouble — nope, the Rockers do some cheating bullshit, which Gorilla and Rodney agree is fine. But the Express get the advantage right back. They do some slingshot crap but Michaels breaks up a second attempt, and Marty winds up slingshotted into a sunset flip on Tanaka for the win.

Neat finish and still a good match but to be honest I’ve always kinda thought of this match as, like, a Maxim spread compared to Hustler Crockett tags and still do. This is probably a match best if you grew up almost solely on the WWF of this era, where it really stands out for quality. I grew up WITH the WWF of this era, but not solely. Would it have stood out on the National Wrestling Alliance’s Worldwide program five years earlier? Somewhat, I suppose, but not as much. This is a lot of negative feedback for a really good match, mind you, but I can never shake the feeling that I’ve seen this match done better many, many times.

Rating: 3.5/5