WWF Armageddon, Birmingham, AL
This is a request, a six-way Hell in a Cell match for Kurt Angle’s WWF title in the main event of the only WWE pay-per-view ever held in Alabama. The six-man Hell in a Cell match came from the mind of Commissioner Mick Foley, who decided to bring an end to the absurd chaos of the World Wrestling Federation by just sticking six top guys in a Cell for Angle’s WWF title.
After the video package, the Cell gets lowered, WUMWUMWUM. “I’ve had the privilege of sitting here for over 20 years,” Jim Ross says. “I don’t have a good feeling about this. Is this what sports-entertainment is all about?”
HHH’s music is the MY TAAAH MY TAAAAH music without the vocals. Questionable if he would pass modern Wellness. Rikishi is newly evil and the lucky recipient of a Jim Johnston Rap upon his heel turn.
Angle is actually out third despite being the champion. I, respecter of TRADITION, will not list it this way in the title. Jim Ross guarantees us that music aside, Undertaker does not have a “limp biscuit.”
Rock out second-to-last, and the difference in response between him and Taker makes it hilarious that people still manage to pretend that the Attitude Era was not Austin, Rock, and a supporting cast; a wonderful, talented, extremely strong supporting cast, no question, but a supporting cast. It’s like Tombstone. Ultimately it’s about Russell and Kilmer, but yeah you DO have Sam Elliott, you DO have Powers Booth, you DO have Michael Biehn, you DO have Bill Paxton and Stephen Lang and Jon Tenney and Thomas Haden Church and Billy Zane and Jason Priestley and goddamn Charlton Heston and Billy Bob Thornton and John Corbett in small roles. Paul Ben-Victor plays a Mexican! Terry O’Quinn is there! Buck Taylor and Peter Sherayko! Frank Stallone! This thing is a galaxy of stars!
Austin has the Disturbed version of his theme. His pop is the clear biggest in Dec. 2000; now granted Rock was starting to gain on him for realsies, and this was Alabama, but still worth noting. He gets the fight going right as he gets down there, and it’s just a buncha guys fighting — Taker and Angle, Rikishi and Rock, Austin and HHH.
JR suggests Vince took out a large insurance policy on each guy here.
Lawler: “You think somebody would insure a Hell in a Cell match? Not even Lloyd’s of London would touch that!”
JR: “I dunno, sometimes they’re pretty stupid.”
This is first fall wins, not elimination or anything, so the chaos is always guaranteed to be there.
HHH is the first guy to bleed thanks to Austin raking his face on the cage repeatedly. Rikishi and HHH team up for a moment, but HHH betrays Rikishi and Rock has to make a save after a Pedigree. Angle hits the Olympic Slam (still named) on Rock, but Austin saves and hits the Stunner on Angle, but Undertaker breaks that up. Undertaker chokeslam on Austin, and Big Mark is the only man standing. He pins, HHH saves.
Then in the middle of all this, Vince McMahon, Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco are standing on the bed of a big ass truck, which is being backed to the ring under Vince’s orders to tear the Cell down. The door gets ripped off, meaning folks can easily get outside, but then Commissioner Foley — who has promised to resign if anyone is “seriously injured” in the match — comes down, beats up the Stooges, and has Vince hauled off by the police, screaming about how he owns this damn place.
With the door open, the fight goes out to the aisle, with that truck still there, of course, and coming into play, with Austin getting busted open when Hunter puts his head through a window. There’s also a whole junkyard ass set up by the entrance where everyone fights.
Rock gets pedigreed on the roof of a car. That busts him open. Taker gets busted open a couple minutes later. HHH gets the crowd hard by climbing the side of the cage, and Austin goes after him. Undertaker and Angle go into the crowd. Austin goes to the other side of the cage to climb from there, with HHH up on top already on the other side. They tease HHH going off the cage, but he doesn’t.
Taker and Angle climb up there now. It’s too many people up there, IMO. Angle busted open now. HHH gets booed for climbing down. And now Rikishi si trying to climb up to escape The Rock’s wrath. We haven’t seen either of them in a bit.
Rikishi gets a chair and wears out Angle and Taker, and Angle gets the fuck down. Taker and Rikishi fight and wander over toward the edge. The obvious candidates to take the Cell fall were HHH and Angle.
Instead, it’s Rikishi’s big ass, getting “chokeslammed” off the side by Undertaker down into the bed of the truck, which had plenty of shit to land on. It’s one of the most underwhelming Big Crazy Bumps ever, in all honesty. I respect the risk the big man took here for sure, but it is, like, artistically flat.
Austin and Rock, having steered clear of one another for the entire match, come face to face in the ring, let the tension build,and then get at it. HHH breaks it up before anything big can happen, but the heat is quite obviously still there for Austin-Rock, which would headline WrestleMania for a second time in a few months.
Angle gets in there but runs into a Rock Bottom, Austin breaking the pin at two. Austin hits a Stunner on Rock, and is slow to crawl to the pin, allowing Hunter the chance to get in and get involved. Meanwhile, Angle drapes one hand on the Rock — and retains his title.
I hadn’t watched this match in like 18 years. It mostly holds up. The Big Spot is flatter than ever, though. I mean respect to Rikishi for agreeing to do that at all, but it’s never really hit for me. Feels forced in just to have someone take a bump off the Cell. The finish is OK, works well enough to keep the belt on Angle just a bit longer, against big odds. Nobody’s really a standout MVP of this match, either, but if I had to name one guy I might go with HHH, first to bleed, best bleeder. It was fun to revisit, though, no question.
Tape Machines Are Rolling 
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