Mean Mark vs Johnny Ace (WCW, 5-19-1990)

WCW Capital Combat: Return of RoboCop, Washington, DC

This was a WCW pay-per-view based around the theme of RoboCop joining WCW for a night. This was a wonderful idea. Also this is a request.

Johnny Ace is, of course, Johnny Ace, standout gaijin, star of “Total Bellas” on the E! channel. Mean Mark is better known as Texas Red. I am just joking with you, obviously he is best known as Kane the Undertaker.

It is absolutely insane that this guy is about to to work WrestleMania for the 27th time tonight or tomorrow. Not because of any personal feelings I have about him, that’s not my point. It’s insane that anyone has worked 27 of 36 WrestleManias. The only other guy really near him is Triple H at 23, and the closest with any significant gas left in the tank is Randy Orton, who will have his 16th Mania match this year. Records are made to be broken, and guys are sticking around longer than ever (I mean, that’s how Taker and HHH have reached those totals in the first place), but goddamn.

Mean Mark recently perfected the heart punch on a tour of Japan, and he played a season of Division II college basketball, so you KNOW Jim Ross is hard. Bob Caudle says Mark’s favorite pet is a snake, if you can believe it or not. And Jim Ross says his favorite singer is Ozzy Osbourne, “who bites the heads off of bats and those things.” Fuck, like, you bite ONE bat’s head off, you’re forever the bat head biting guy.

Mark doesn’t budge on shoulderblocks, but Ace dropkicks him out of the ring and then dives right onto him and rains down some right hands. Ace hits a nice springboard crossbody in the ring. The obvious star of this match.

“Johnny Ace another one of those 1990s type athletes. He graduated from the University of Minnesota with a degree in business.” Jim Ross really thought anyone gave a fucking fuck where the guys in their underpants went to college and what they studied. Ross would do this for years even when it halfway ruined a guy’s whole deal. “Mantaur was a fine amateur, his real name is Mike Halac!” Bitch he’s a cow.

Mark takes over and Ace gets caught up paying attention to Mark’s manager Theodore R. Long, which allows Mark to keep control. Caudle predicts these youngsters will both be around “a long, long time,” and in reality he is correct. Ace never took off as a wrestler in the U.S. but had a very fine career in Japan.

Mark drops a big leg, which he was as good at as anyone ever, the simple legdrop. Incredible height, and I don’t know if you’ve ever backyard wrestled or just tried to drop a leg on a whim in your yard or at the park or whatever, but you really gotta be willing to land flat on your ass. It’s not a natural instinct for your body.

Mark continues to build his confidence as he’s largely dominating this match. Long gets in there, too, just because he can, and he’s a fuck, that Peanuthead. Ace gets a surge of adrenaline, as Ross puts it, throws some dropkicks and a monkey flip. You can see so much potential in both these guys. Mark especially is still pretty green but his athleticism at that size is wild. Vince taking that away from him for years and still getting one of the all-time most enduring gimmicks out of him is like hitting a 900-foot home run to win the World Series.

Mark finishes with a running heart punch and a rope walk flying elbow, which makes the Slam-O-Meter and registers at an 8.2. Devastating.

This is pretty fun. Again, you see the obvious big potential of both guys. Mark is huge and athletic and has a presence to him. You’d never guess Undertaker for him, but he got it and killed it. Ace was a big dude, too, good athlete, could move like a son of a bitch, found his niche in the business and had a nice career. Good early look at both guys.

Rating: 3/5